Philippians 4:8

Introduction

Our topic this evening is emotional purity and to start off I thought that I would share a little bit about why I chose this. Some of you especially those in Jr. High are probably thinking, “I don’t like boys, they’re weird. I would never like one, so why are we talking about this?” When I was in Jr. High I thought the same thing. Then when I got into high school I did start noticing them. However since I didn’t even really know what guarding your heart really meant and because I didn’t effectively fight the temptation, this became a struggle for me throughout high school. By God’s grace He has shown me how to fight that sin and so I wanted to share with you what God has taught me.

Our text this evening is Philippians 4:8.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

To dwell means to “live or stay as a permanent resident; reside. 2. to live or continue in a given condition or state: to dwell in happiness. 3. to linger over, emphasize, or ponder in thought, speech, or writing (often fol. by on or upon.” The KJV, NIV, and ESV all say “think” instead of dwell, a synonym for both those is meditate. What are you meditating on? Is it glorifying to God? According to Philippians we are to think on what is pure, lovely, excellent, worthy of praise, honorable, and true. But Satan doesn’t want us to keep our focus on God, that’s why it is a battle to keep our emotions from controlling our thought life.

1. The Fight

As women God made us emotional beings. All to often we let our emotions lead instead of having them follow. When we see a cute guy or someone that we like comes up to us to talk, where does our mind immediately go? We start the sometimes weeks long pondering that maybe he likes me, and he was telling me this by talking to me. We tend to analyze every move a guy makes because we want believe in our head that he is as madly “in love” with us are we are of him.

What does Philippians 4:8 say we are to think on? Is analyzing something that most likely means nothing, good, pure, and honorable? No, this is just the opposite. Is there anything wrong with noticing guys and feeling attraction to them? No, but what do you do with that attraction? Do you let it plant a seed in your mind, water it, and let it grow until is so big you don’t know how to get rid of it? Or do you just notice and move on with life keeping Christ as your focus? Some of you may be thinking, why does it matter? Who cares if I think about boys more than I do about God? Well, God does, whatever replaces God in our lives is an idol.

However at that time you did not know God, you were slaves to those which by nature are no gods. But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how is it that you turn back again to the weak and worthless elemental things, to which you desire to be enslaved all over again? (Galatians 4:8-9)

Being ruled by our emotions and looking to guys, or even our infatuation with guys, to be what we think will satisfy us is a sin. Why would we want to be enslaved to our emotions? What lasting joy is there in that? There is none, you may have a fleeting moment of happiness, but that’s about it. Where can we find lasting joy and satisfaction? Only in Christ and it is only through Him and we can have victory in the fight over our emotions.

2. Victory

All through high school in my struggle with emotional purity I was lacking the one thing that could give me victory. I was looking to my own strength to win the battle, instead of instead of relying on Christ. Much like Israel, when they didn’t do things the way God told them to or didn’t seek his wisdom failed miserably, so will we if we don’t look to Him to win the battle for us. Christ does not want to see us fail, He said He would never leave us nor forsake us. It is through giving the battle completely over to Him and meditating on Scripture that will give us victory over this battle. One of our theme verses this year is:

Watch over your heart with all diligence for from it flow the springs of life. (Proverbs 4:23)

The NIV says to guard your heart, which in my mind implies more of an urgency, because do we guard something that isn’t precious? How can we guard our hearts if we aren’t meditating on Scripture? We can’t, we can try but we will fail miserably.

Besides meditating on scripture how can you practically guard yourself? For each of you it will be different, maybe some of you need to stop seeing certain kinds of movies or looking at magazines, reading certain books, or maybe even for some of you finding other people to hang out with. The world does pull you down, even if you don’t notice it.

Back to Philippians, is what you dwell on pleasing in the sight of the Lord? Just because we don’t know what goes through your brain on a daily basis, doesn’t mean that you can get off scott free. God sees your thoughts; Psalm 139:2 says, “You know my thoughts afar off.” So ask God to reveal any sin that you may have in this area and ask Him to give you strength to fight the fight and victory in the fight.

Good evening ladies. Thank you for coming. Let’s bow our heads in prayer.

The title of this evening’s message is “Stewardship:Time, Temple, and Treasure.” Again, that is stewardship with your #1 time, #2 temple (which is another word for your body), and #3 treasure, in others words, money. This message tonight should be a fairly practical, and, Lord willing, applicable message.

We’ll begin with a definition of stewardship. According to Webster’s Dictionary, stewardship is “the conducting, supervising, or managing of something; especially: the careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one’s care.” I really like that, “something entrusted to one’s care.” I think about when someone has entrusted me with their children to watch for awhile. When I am watching their children, I am on a greater alert with them because they are not my own children, and I desperately don’t want anything to happen to them. I would feel awful if something did. Obviously, I would feel totally awful if something bad happened to my girls, but because these other children belong to someone else, I feel like I have an even higher responsibility and obligation to care for them. What if we looked at EVERYTHING we “own” and looked at it all through the perspective that it is God’s and not our own? Would we handle these things differently? God has entrusted us with many things to manage such as our homework, time, our bodies, money, other people, and the list goes on…. The question is, how are we caring for the things with which He has entrusted us? We will come back to this when we talk about the third point, Treasure.

One can say that stewardship is a passion of mine, and it started with the stewardship of money, as you will hear in my following example. Then stewardship started translating into other parts of my life as I grew as a Christian. Maybe stewardship is so important to me because when my sister and I were growing up, we didn’t have many extras, never ate out besides McDonalds and maybe upgraded to Dairy Queen for our birthdays. Before I was in elementary school, we spent about a year living at my grandparents house on their floor, my mom, dad, sister and myself. Our weekly outing when I was in elementary school was going to the Lynnwood Goodwill to see the bargains. I remember my dad being really excited when the weekly bargain was that all sweaters were on sale for $.10. My dad is still very much a Goodwill shopper, and taught me by example how to treat $ like we don’t have any. So that’s a little about my background.

If you have a relationship with Christ, and have given Him your heart, you will want to make sure that you are being good stewards with all that the Lord has entrusted to you. These principles should be an outpouring of your relationship with Christ. We should be good stewards because we love the Lord, and not because doing any good works is going to get us to heaven, because it won’t.

There are so many points that I could talk about, and I am sure that I am only scratching the surface, but here we begin.

What does God say about stewardship? Turn in your Bible to Ephesians chapter 5, verse 11. This passage really struck me. Listen to hear if you can find the implications of what we should be doing with specifically, our time, temple, and treasure.

Ephesians 5:11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness (maybe this is talking about how we spend our time?), but instead even expose them; 12 for it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret. 13 But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light. 14 For this reason it says, “Awake, sleeper, And arise from the dead, And Christ will shine on you.” 15 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, 16 making the most of your time, because the days are evil. 17 So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not get drunk with wine (maybe this is talking about how to handle our temples, our bodies), for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; 20 always giving thanks for all things (maybe this is talking about what we treasure) in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; 21 and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.

Now let’s look at the 3 points, time, temple, and treasure, and we’ll start with time.

God has entrusted us with:

1. TIME

How do you spend your time? What does your typical day look like? If you were to write out your day, what you do minute by minute, what would you see? Are you spending an excessive amount of time in front of the TV? Playing video games? In front of the mirror? Texting and on the phone? On the computer? Are we spending the time we need in the Word of the Lord and prayer? Are we volunteering or serving? Ephesians 5:15-16 says this, “Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.” Ladies, are we making the most of our time?

Time in God’s Word and prayer is a great place to start. It is not a cure-all. Our lives won’t be free of problems if we read His Word and/or pray, but these things ground us, and center us on Him. It helps put our focus on the Lord and others, and not ourselves. Being grounded in the Lord daily by reading His Word and praying helps us to fear God and keep His commandments, as this is the whole duty of man (Ecc. 12:13).

Turn to 2 Timothy 3:16-17. Those verses explain that “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” Ladies, are you taking time to equip yourselves daily by being in the Word?

This next Scripture applies to moms and future moms, especially. Turn to Deuteronomy Chapter 11.

11:18 Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 19 Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates, 21 so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the LORD swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

Moms, as we go about our day, are we teaching our children the Word even in the mundane parts of life as we eat and walk and talk?

As far as prayer goes, I have a few verses to share. Turn to Romans 12. Romans 12:12 in the NIV says, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” I Thessalonians 5:17 says “Pray continually.” If you want to get started on memorizing scripture, that might be a really good one because it is so short:) “Pray continually!”

Are you serving your parents, siblings and neighbors? Are you selfish with your time and only want to spend it in, what you see as, gain for yourselves? Are you spending too much time away at a friend’s house or the mall, and not spending enough time with your families? Ladies, I am not saying that there is anything wrong with having a little down time and relaxing or something, but is it excessive? Going back to Romans 12, verses 10-11 say “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.” Ladies, when you serve others, you are serving the Lord. Skipping to verse 13, are we taking some time “”[to]share with God’s people who are in need. [And] Practice hospitality”?

So ask yourself, am I making the most with the time God has given me?

So first, God has entrusted us with time, and second, God has also entrusted us with our temples which are our bodies.

2. TEMPLES

Ladies, how are you doing at taking care of your temples of God? Are you keeping your thoughts pure? Are you exercising regularly? Are you eating right, or are you eating an excessive amount of sweets and junk? Or are you just eating too much or too little?

Romans chapter 12 is one of my favorite chapters. Let’s look at the first 2 verses this time. Romans 12:1-2 says,

Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

If you are a Christian, the Holy Spirit lives inside of you, helping you to make right choices. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 that “your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God. You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” This means that we should keep ourselves morally pure, our bodies pure, and thoughts pure. We should keep our bodies covered properly by covering what should be covered and not giving our spiritual brothers something to stumble over. We should care for our bodies with exercising and not putting a lot of junk into them.

Ladies, food can actually be a huge stumbling block. 1 Corinthians chapter 10 verse 31 says “whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, you must do all for the glory of God.” This verse can really hit home. We should think when we are eating am I glorifying God by putting this in my mouth?

Here is the practical application for me, and it will probably look different for you. For me this means we try to eat fruits and veggies but we still seem to never eat enough. We try to eat at home most of the time and not eat out. We are trying to limit our intake of transfats, and high fructose corn syrup and trying to not eat as many processed or prepackaged foods.

I know this next part sounds dumb, but maybe some of you can relate, so I will share. This is a practical example, perhaps. About 5 years ago, I started eating until I felt satisfied, not full. There is a difference. When we are full, we feel like we are going to pop. I eat until I feel satisfied, not until I am packed up to here. It’s so easy to want to take another bite when it’s right in front of us. But try to resist the temptation, and save it for later. My husband says when we eat out, he’ll be much happier the next day if he saves some of his meal so he can enjoy it 2 days instead of one. If he eats until he’s stuffed, then he won’t get to enjoy it again, and may really regret it later. My high school choir director told me that we gain weight when we are cleaning up the dishes after dinner and see a few more bites in this bowl or that plate that we don’t want to go to waste or don’t want to store for later. That’s when we put on the excess calories which then translates to excess weight. So remember, whatever you eat or drink, whatever you do, glorify God. Think, am I glorifying God taking these lasts 5 bites left on my plate when I am stuffed all the way up my esophagus already?

Anyway, I do LOVE desserts!!! What I used to do in college was tell myself I can’t eat ANY dessert until I do 100 sit-ups, so I was TOTALLY faithful in doing my sit-ups everyday because I wanted to eat my special treat each day. Moderation is what we are looking for.

As far as exercise is concerning I try to meet consistently with different ladies to go walking or running every weekday. I am accountable to them to exercise, and an added bonus is the fellowship (which is actually much more important to me than the exercising).

And ladies, there are a few more areas I want to mention but don’t have time to go into detail. Here are some areas to think about. What are we putting into our minds? Are we thinking about a boy excessively, that we would really like to date? Are we thinking positive thoughts of this girl or that girl, or are we gossiping? Are you keeping your temples sexually pure? 1 Thessalonians 4:3-7 says,

It is God’s will (by the way, I love to know God’s will) that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.

But that’s a message in and of itself. Then in 1 Corinthians 9:27 it says, “No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.” Ladies, don’t disqualify yourselves from receiving the prize of being with Christ eternally by making rash moves.

Again, remember this Scripture, from 1 Corinthians 10:31 “whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, you must do all for the glory of God.” So the big question is, are you glorifying God with your temple?

So are we being a good steward first with our time, and second with our temple? The third and last main point of the evening is are we being a good steward with #3, the treasure God has entrusted to us, money?

3. TREASURE

On what are we spending our money? Are we thinking of our money as a gift from the Lord to use as His, or are we thinking like a greedy 2 year-old-would and think “Mine”? Ladies, as soon as you have an allowance or get your first job or have an allowance, you should be giving some of the money the Lord has given to you back to His church. We need to give. I challenge you to give 10% to the Lord. The earlier you start the better and easier it is to give back the money to the Lord.

If we were to open your checkbook (for those of you who have one), or look at all the receipts of your recent purchases, what would we see? Would we see foolish, indulgent purchases? Would we see lots of expenditures based on want or would they all be, quote, needs? Are we generous in our gift giving or do we hoard?

What kind of perspective do we have with our money and material goods? Matthew 6 talks about our treasure. Please open your Bibles to Matthew 6 verses 19-21 and 24.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.

Mammon is earthly material treasures, especially money. Make sure you have the right perspective about money. It’s a delicate balance. You don’t want it to consume your thoughts, but you don’t want to be flippant about it, either.

Here is another Scripture passage from Luke 16 regarding stewardship.
Luke 16:1-13 is the Parable of the Dishonest Manager.

1 Now He was also saying to the disciples, “There was a rich man who had a manager, and this manager was reported to him as squandering his possessions. 2 And he called him and said to him, ‘What is this I hear about you? Give an accounting of your management, for you can no longer be manager.’ 3 The manager said to himself, ‘What shall I do, since my master is taking the management away from me? I am not strong enough to dig; I am ashamed to beg. 4 I know what I shall do, so that when I am removed from the management people will welcome me into their homes.’ 5 And he summoned each one of his master’s debtors, and he began saying to the first, ‘How much do you owe my master?’ 6 And he said, ‘A hundred measures of oil.’ And he said to him, ‘Take your bill, and sit down quickly and write fifty.’ 7 Then he said to another, ‘And how much do you owe?’ And he said, ‘A hundred measures of wheat.’ He said to him, ‘Take your bill, and write eighty.’ 8 And his master praised the unrighteous manager because he had acted shrewdly; for the sons of this age are more shrewd in relation to their own kind than the sons of light. 9 And I say to you, make friends for yourselves by means of the wealth of unrighteousness, so that when it fails, they will receive you into the eternal dwellings. 10 He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much. 11 Therefore if you have not been faithful in the use of unrighteous wealth, who will entrust the true riches to you? 12 And if you have not been faithful in the use of that which is another’s, who will give you that which is your own? 13 No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.”

Ladies, the concept is very true, if you can’t be trusted with little, when you have abundance, than when you gain much, it will be as hard or harder to control than when you have little.

Practically speaking, I shop sales, looking through the ads, cutting coupons, comparing prices at different stores. I know where to get the perishables every week we need at the lowest prices around. I do shop multiple store, which may be annoying to some, but instead of spending two hours at one store, I spend two hours going to three or four stores and getting a few things at each place. It saves a lot of money. I don’t buy when I need things; I buy when things are on sale. I buy the sale items we will use, and rarely buy things when we “need” them. If you buy things when you need them, then you typically pay at least double for them. I try to find things at or below a certain target price in my mind and wait. I decide what to make based on what we have and not because I am wanting to make a certain recipe. I keep what I know I will use in the house. In the fall I averaged my grocery bill for our family for 6 weeks, and it was $42/week. It is probably more now with inflation and the price of food going up, but anyway, I would love to talk more about this with people individually, as I know I am only scratching the surface and it may bore others.

As I close ladies, ask yourselves, how am I caring for the things in which the Lord has entrusted me? First, am I spending my time wisely? Second, am I taking care of my temple? And third, am I treating my treasure the way the Lord would want me to?

Tonight I am going to talk about the different things I was challenged by or learned while I was in Germany. So, let’s just jump in.

1. Submission

You know, a lot of times we think that life is all about us. But as a woman, we will always be under someone. First we are under Christ and then second we are under our parents and then a husband. Life isn’t about how you feel or what you think, it about Christ and how your head feels (being your parents or your husband). So often I think we get in the mindset of I don’t like (blank) or I am feeling (blank). When in all actuality it should be how can I honor and serve Christ and how can I serve others. Get the attention OFF YOUR YOURSELF and try putting it on Christ and maybe even someone else! We are always called to serve. So stop feeling sorry for yourself because it’s hard to obey your parents or that girl is being mean and start looking for ways to bless them. John Piper said this in one of his sermons, “Take all your hope for happiness and pin it on God!” When we obey and submit to our parents we are actually setting ourselves up for blessing and happiness. Instead of focusing on a boy you like and trying to find happiness in that relationship (or whatever the thing may be you are trying to find happiness in), why don’t you try taking that energy and “pinning” it on God! He will bless your socks off and you will have an unspeakable joy and happiness in Him, for you will be focused on things of eternity.

The blessing in submission is far GREATER than the act itself. As my parents and I were talking about the opportunity I had to go to Germany I wasn’t really all that excited. I knew that was where I was supposed to be, but I wasn’t looking forward to being away for seven weeks (which isn’t even all that long). I was going to Germany out of obedience and that was about it. Once I got there, the Lord showed me how great submission really is. He was gracious to keep me focused on him instead of the fact that I was thousands of miles away from the people I loved. Homesickness was very minimal. I cannot tell you how truly great it is to be in full submission to your parents and the will of God. Obey in the hard things and see how God will provide and bless you!

2. Bible centered

Here we struggle to read our Bible everyday yet it should be the FOCUS of all we do. How can it be the focus if we can’t even read it daily? In Deuteronomy 6:7 we’re commanded to teach the things of the Lord to our children. How can you teach your children something you don’t know? When I was in Berlin, I was so challenged by how much those kids knew. They know more than I do. It just really showed me that I have so much more to learn. Also in Deuteronomy 6:7 it tells us we are to be teaching our children the things of the Lord when we sit in your house, when we walk by the way, when we lie down, and when we rise. That pretty much covers ALL DAY LONG! We are to be teaching these things ALL THE TIME! Are you ready to be teaching your family the things of the Lord all the time? That’s a big responsibility!

Memorize what is in each chapter of the Bible. And as you read your Bible be thinking of principles that will help you in daily situations. That way instead of always saying… Because I said so, you can say, “The Bible says….”

Stop giving excuses for not reading your Bible. The reason you are not reading is not because you are too busy because you have time to hang out with your friends, to watch TV, and to go on the Internet. And it’s not because you don’t like reading because you read that note from the boy you like over and over again. The reason you don’t read your Bible is because it’s not a priority! It is because TV and friends are more important and because your dislike for reading is stronger than your love for the Lord.

And the thing is that just because you read your Bible that doesn’t mean that you are Bible centered. We are to be focusing on God’s Word all day long. It should be our source of strength and the thing we turn to for wisdom. We should be MEDITATING on it DAY and NIGHT (Joshua 1:8)! Not just reading it to check it off of some list.

3. Home centered

Are you domestically equipped or are you being domestically equipped? In Titus 2:3-5, the fourth thing that is mentioned for the older woman to be teaching the younger woman is to be working at home! This is the first actual call to action. We are to be home centered, not education centered or career cantered. Now, I am not saying that we are not to have an education or a woman can’t have a job, but I am say all those things should be done with the focus of making you more home centered. Education should be done with the mindset of making you a wise educated helpmate and mother and the career should be done for just a season. Our hearts should be in the home and our desire should be to be at home.

Go to school with the mindset of learning to teach! I wish I had gone through school with at least the mindset of teaching my children! So many of the facts I learned I only learned them to pass the quiz and then out of my head they went. Take advantage of this time and learn all you can.

Learn all you can from home now. Your mothers have much to offer you and take advantage of that now, because believe it or not, you have more time now than you ever will!

4. Christ, Great High Priest

When I was in Berlin, I was in Hebrews for my personal devotions. It was such an encouragement to me and it was just what I needed to be reading. I was so encouraged by the fact that we have a Great High Priest who can sympathize with us. He knows exactly how we feel! He has been tempted in every way we have been (and yet without sin) and He knows greater sorrow then we have ever known for He was separated from His perfect Father (Hebrews 4:15-16). Run to Christ; He will give you the grace and He WILL help you in time of need!

Also, I was encouraged by thinking about how we have a Great High Priest who has paid for all of our sins. The ones from yesterday, today, and even the ones we will commit! He has already paid for all of our sins and that should cause us to rejoice and focus on Christ instead of our sins. We stand before Christ perfect, and that should cause us to rejoice!

5. Christ, the hole filler

All of our needs should be found and filled by Christ. He is the one who put the needs in our hearts and the only one who can perfectly fill them! We are to look to Christ for our satisfaction and as soon as we look for it in a person, that person will let us down. In fact, Christ is driving us to our knees so that we put our dependence in Him. He will be the mother to the motherless, Father to the fatherless, and He will be the Friend to the friendless. We all feel lonely at time, but when we look to Christ He will fill that void for us. Fall on your knees before Him and ask Him to help you love Him more in light of the loss!

As I was talking to Lois about this, she gave me the example of her brother getting married. She was excited for him but at the same time realized that now meant that she was no longer the “girl” in his life (since they had a really good relationship). He was now moving on and “leaving” the family. But in that she saw how Christ could fill that hole that was now left in her heart from her brother. So as relationships change and you “lose” friends, just remember that Christ is always there and He is ready to be that friend to you! He will provide a grace like no other for you to get through the hard times.

In Philippians 4:11-13 Paul is saying that he knows how is feels to have much and to have little (in the world’s eyes). Yet, through all of the hard times he said he learned to be content because he knew that those things are all from God. He knew that God would provide for Him and would be his all. Paul truly understood what it was like to be alone, and yet He rejoiced! So, rejoice in your hard times since they drive us to our knees before God. It is in those times we have sweet communion with our Father for all the things of the world are gone and it is just Him and us!

Even when Lois lost her first husband, she said that she had a grace from God that no one else could understand. She said she thought it was harder for others than for her because Christ provided a supernatural grace to her! Christ even provided a new husband, a new love, and helped her overcome the loss for her first one.

God was even gracious to provide four beautiful kids with Buddy (her first husband). He was in seminary and they were planning on waiting until he graduated to have children, but God had other plans for them. If they had waited until he was done with seminary, she would have had no precious children to remember him by.

6. Please God and NOT man

Even in my “conviction” of my sin I have to see if I feel bad because it’s ruining my reputation or if it is because I have sinned against our Holy God! Galatians 1: 10 says, For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. You really do have to choose pleasing God or man. It doesn’t matter what others think of you. in light of eternity the only thing that matters is if God is pleased.

Even when you get dressed in the morning are you picking out your clothes so that boy will notice you or that girl will say she likes your new whatever? Or are you getting dressed to bring glory and honor to God? That is a hard one, but again in light of eternity who cares if your hair always looks good. Even with weight–coming from one who struggles with their weight–are you loosing the weight so you look good and get compliments or is it so you honor God in your discipline and denying the flesh? There is a fine line there.

And then there’s the other side. You don’t care what you look like, how much you weigh, or what people think of you. This too can be sin. You are not taking care of what God has given you. There needs to be a balance. We should get dressed in the morning for the glory of God. We should eat or not eat something for the glory of God (and depending on what side of the spectrum you are on, that may be eating the dessert or denying the dessert). The point is, in all you do seek to bring glory to God and not yourself or man!

7. Proactive serving

As I watched the Green’s I noticed that they were always looking for opportunities to serve others. Just an example of this–there is a lady in their church who has cancer. She is in a lot of pain and it affects her ability to walk or even stand for any amount of time. Every Sunday that she comes, Eshte is quick to go and get her a cup of hot tea. So often we let those little opportunities pass when we could be blessing those around us. Look for ways to serve others! So often we get stuck looking at ourselves and how we have no friends or whatever the case may be, when we could be serving those who have it far worse than we do. Get off yourself and look to others! Galatians 5:13-14 says, For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself’.

So, with all of this, I would like to challenge you to look at your mindset and see if it lines up with what God has called us to be thinking doing as woman: Submit, be woman of the Word and of the home while loving Christ and others!

We need to think about the things we face every day–books, entertainment, the news, preaching. What do magazines like Seventeen tell us about true beauty, purpose, or worth? What do movies like the Pirates of the Caribbean tell us about how we should react to authority, or what is most worthwhile in life, or the type of character we should foster?

We have to build a filtration system for our brain. Not only do we need to be careful what we are exposed to, we MUST analyze and critically evaluate the things that we do allow in, even “good” things like books on Christian living or wholesome movies.

I. Being a Woman of The Book (The Word)

Look at Hebrews 5:14.

But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.

The context here is the Perfect High Priest, and the author of Hebrew’s condemnation of his readers’ “dullness.” All Christians should desire to eat “solid food,” but note that such food is for “the mature, who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil.” This means we must learn to discipline and exercise our discernment. Over our traditions! With films! With magazines!

REMEMBER: This takes effort. We “practice” and “train” to master certain sports, hobbies, and talents–think of all the time and diligence we put into becoming good basketball players or painters. It is SO MUCH more important to become wise and discerning!

1) We must be women of the Word because we must be women of God.

Remember, we are responsible for our walk with the Lord! We are responsible for how we spend our time and what we fill our minds with! Biblical learning is required of us (1 Tim. 2:11). Many women chafe against this verse, but note it does say “Women should learn….”

As Nancy Wilson says in her book, The Fruit of Her Hands,

we have to know more than how to be a good wife. After all, our first calling is to be good Christians, and if we are good Christians, we will be food wives and mothers…we see in Scripture that women became disciples along with the men. What is a disciple? It is not a mindless follower. A disciple is a student.

If we are blessed to be mothers, we must know the Word to teach it to our children. What an awesome responsibility!

2) We must be women of the Word because we must seek after wisdom.

This is IMPORTANT! Listen to Wisdom’s warning in Proverbs 1:32:

For the waywardness of the naïve will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy them.

Girls, we are often naïve and gullible. We think it’s “not too bad” to be naïve-–but notice here it can lead to death! What a strong warning! It started with Eve in the garden–her passive attention to the Serpent introduced death to the human race. I believe this is part of why God has set fathers and husbands over us, to protect us.

Often Proverbs and other books warn young men of the “foreign woman.” Rarely are women warned against such things–but listen to Paul’s warning to Timothy (1 Tim. 3:6) in discussing false teachers:

For among them are those who enter into households and captivate weak women weighed down with sins, led on by various impulses, always learning and never able to come to knowledge of the truth.

Being women of the Book is protection! You will someday be tempted!!! You do not want to be “weighed down with sins, led on by various impulses, and always learning” because you haven’t trained your brain and fed it with the food of the Word.

In my own life, I have experienced times of temptation. When I was in Jr. High, I thought I was such a strong Christian and influencing the bad people around me, when in fact I didn’t spend time in the Word or at Church. Accordingly, I was led astray by those who “cause divisions” (Rom. 16:17-19). God graciously saved me from those mistakes, and as I got involved in a small group, church, and in the Word, my wisdom and discernment grew. When I faced a similar situation in college, through God’s grace, I realized that individual was speaking lies and walked away.

II. Being a Woman of the book:

1) One of the reasons we seek education and seek to educate our children is SO THAT they understand the Word!

As John Piper points out, reading the Bible is difficult:

This is an overwhelming argument for giving our children a disciplined and rigorous training in how to think an author’s thoughts after him from a text—especially a biblical text. An alphabet must be learned, as well as vocabulary, grammar, syntax, the rudiments of logic, and the way meaning is imparted through sustained connections of sentences and paragraphs.

The reason Christians have always planted schools where they have planted churches is because we are a people of THE BOOK. It is true that THE BOOK will never have its proper effect without prayer and the Holy Spirit. It is not a textbook to be debated; it is a fountain for spiritual thirst, and food for the soul, and a revelation of God, and a living power, and a two-edged sword. But none of this changes the fact: apart from the discipline of reading, the Bible is as powerless as paper. Someone might have to read it for you; but without reading, the meaning and the power of it are locked up.

2) We seek education in God’s truth SO THAT we have discernment to fight the World’s system.

NOTE! Again, here, we must FIRST have the Word and then pursue this. We must build in our “filter.”

I always look to Paul as my example of this, specifically at the Agora in Athens. He understood the Greek philosophers, as MacArthur points out, “He was a scholar, well-read and well-traveled. By God’s designed Paul’s entire life equipped him for situations precisely like this one” (Ashamed of the Gospel, p. 139).

He became all things to all men, and that is what we must do! HOWEVER, as Francis Schaeffer once wrote, “to accommodate to the world spirit about us in our age is the most gross form of worldliness in the proper definition of the word.” Paul never compromised the message, though his form might change to engage his audience.

3) We seek education SO THAT we know what in the World we don’t need.

We need to know why we believe what we do. We need to fight against error. Sometimes, that means understanding the errors and why they are wrong. Examples: Evolution, popular culture, etc. My favorite quote along this line comes from G.K. Chesterton:

Without education we are in a horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously. The latest fads of culture, the latest sophistries of anarchism will carry us away if we are uneducated: we shall not know how very old are all the new ideas.

The uneducated man will always care too much for complications, novelties, the fashion, the latest thing. Education demands us to know, as Arnold said, all the best literatures, all the best arts, all the best national philosophies. Education commands us to know them all that we may do without them all.

Some important Disclaimers:

First, pursuing knowledge for the sake of knowledge is stupid. As 1 Corinthians 3:18-19 says, “the wisdom of this world is foolishness before God.” In fact, Paul addresses this point extensively in his first epistle to the Corinthians. However, Paul was never anti-intellectual or rational. He often appealed to people’s minds.

Second, education is NOT the highest goal of the Church or Christianity. As Spurgeon argues:

But if the Church of God thinks that it is sent into the world merely to train the mental faculties, it has made a very serious mistake, for the object of Christianity is not to educate men for their secular callings, or even to train them in the politer arts, or the more elegant professions, or to enable them to enjoy the beauties of nature or the charms of poetry. Jesus Christ came not into the world for any of these things, but He came to seek and to save that which was lost; and on the same errand has He sent His Church, and she is a traitor to the Master who sent her if she is beguiled by the beauties of taste and art to forget that to preach Christ and Him crucified is the only object for which she exists among the sons of men. The business of the Church is salvation.

Third, you cannot argue or convince someone into belief. As MacArthur says about Paul: “he was not interested in changing people’s minds; he wanted God to change their lives” (p. 117).

Conclusion

Coming back to Hebrews 5:14-–we must train our minds. We need to engage with the Bible and dig deeper, we must challenge ourselves with difficult reading-–theology and biography!-–so that we can “discern good and evil.” We must pursue wisdom and knowledge of God so we can train-up the next generation in the fear and admonition of the Lord. We must guard our minds against false teachers and flattering lies. Our walk with the Lord, our faith in Him, our ability to live-out our testimonies in the world, and our strength to fight against temptation are all deeply dependent on our discernment and wisdom.

Note: the audio for this message is not available. Thanks to Susan for sharing her notes.

When Pastor Higgins first introduced the idea of dedicating Wednesday nights to Biblical Manhood and Womanhood and having staff lead these discussions, I immediately thought of the passage in 1 Peter 3: 1-6. It has always been a favorite of mine because of its conviction, encouragement and faith building in my life. I pray that it might be for you too.

1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

This section is about submission and obedience to your husband, which has lots of application for you–even though most of you are not married–because Peter describes and illustrates the heart necessary to truly submit and obey.

The example Peter uses is Sarah whom we know from the book of Genesis.

What do you remember about Sarah?

Her name was originally Sarai meaning “my princess” until she was 89 years old. Then God changed her name to Sarah meaning “Princess.” Sarah was stunningly beautiful. Muslim tradition says she resembled Eve, which was significant since the tradition also says God gave Eve 2/3 of all beauty and the remaining third to all the other woman.

Let’s look briefly at Sarah’s life and why Peter chose her to illustrate a holy woman who trusted God and adorned her heart with submission to her husband.

In Genesis God called Abraham out of the sophisticated pagan culture of Ur to a new place. He would lead Abram so that he might be the father of a great nation, that his name would be great, and that he would be a blessing.

Sarah, his wife was willing to leave all and happily follow Abraham to wherever God led them because her faith and hope was in God.

They had no destination plan; no idea where they were going. Hebrews 11:8 reveals that “By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going. By faith he dwelt in the land of promise as in a foreign country dwelling in tents….”

After leaving Ur, they came to Haran and dwelt there for quite some time.

When Abraham was 75 and Sarah 65, God again restated His promise to Abraham to make him a great nation even though there was no child yet. They packed up their tents and left for Canaan which was about 350 miles away, roughly the same distance from Seattle to Spokane.

So here was Sarah, no home, no child and yet the Bible says she was a woman who was submissive to her own husband–she obeyed him, did good, and was not afraid for herself.

When they arrived in Canaan, there was a severe famine so they left for Egypt for food.

Abraham knew Sarah was very beautiful and that the Egyptians would probably want her and would therefore kill him, her husband, to have her. To protect himself, Abraham told her to say she was his sister. Sarah obeyed Abraham even though it meant she would end up in Pharaoh’s harem and her own life put in danger. Sarah was able to do that because she was a worshipper of God. Her faith and hope were in God. She didn’t argue with Abraham or accuse him of being unfair, thinking of himself, not considering her, etc., even though all of those things were true! She just obeyed him.

About 25 years later, a similar situation arose with another King, King Abimilech who was wowed by her beauty (when she was almost 90 years old) and wanted her for his harem. Again Abraham asked her to say she was his sister even though it would be dangerous for her, again Sarah obeyed.

This is an amazing picture of submission even in potentially life threatening situations, and ironically it was her outer beauty that made her inner adorning so important. Who knows what she would have done without a submissive heart. In both situations God intervened and protected Sarah keeping her safe and pure.

Sarah was not perfect though. In between these two stories we read in Genesis 16 that Sarah was still without a child and now about 75 years old. Hope was beginning to grow thin. How would Abraham be the father of a great nation with no heir?

Abraham suggested to God that maybe his servant Eliezer could be the heir. But God said no and confirmed the heir would come from Abraham.

The situation and circumstances made it look like it was impossible for God to fulfill His promise. In weakness and earthly wisdom Sarah made a big mistake by trying to help God out.

It was a custom of that time that a barren wife could have her maid servant go to her husband and if the servant had a baby that baby would legally be the wife’s. Sarah did that with Hagar. Immediately she knew it was wrong, and she became bitter, envious, and treated Hagar with disdain. The result of not trusting God is a lack of a gentle and quiet spirit.

Another 14 years passed and now Sarah was 89 and Abraham was 99. God came to them again but this time He changed their names and again made the promise of a child to be the channel of His covenant blessings. Sure enough, the next year a 90 year old Sarah finally gave birth to Isaac. It was God’s plan all along that Sarah be barren until old age when God would in His time fulfill His promise of a child.

There was more to the picture than just having a child and Sarah did understand that. Sarah’s faith was remarkable and she is included in the “Hall of Faith” in Hebrews 11:11-12. At times though her faith wavered because the situation looked impossible. In reality the situation was impossible and that’s exactly how God wanted it so that there would be no question that it was His doing and for His glory.

Most women would have given up long before and been bitter with disappointment. But Hebrews says Sarah “judged Him faithful who had promised.” Sarah believed God would do what He said He would do. Her hope, her strength was in God and His promises. Because of her faith in God she could obey Abraham and be a blessing to him.

It doesn’t matter whether you are submitting to husband, parents, elders or one another, you must first have a heart that trusts in God. Sarah trusted God first and then was able to obey Abraham.

Let’s look again at 1 Peter 3:4-5. Peter is saying the holy women in former times who trusted God adorned themselves inwardly, in their heart, with a gentle and quiet spirit. This spirit grows out of faith, trust and obedience to God.

Sarah is our example. She had breathtaking physical beauty and wealth to dress in the finest. The hallmark of her life was her faith in God which produced a gentle and quiet spirit by which she freely, enthusiastically and without fear of how things would work out for her submitted and obeyed her husband Abraham.

Peter is admonishing you young ladies and us leaders to adorn our hearts that we also might have a gentle and quiet spirit. Let’s look at how we do that.

Three Amazing Qualities of a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

Peter shows us three amazing qualities of a gentle and quiet spirit: 1) It is the hidden person of the heart, 2) It is of imperishable beauty, 3) It is very precious to God.

1. It is the hidden person of the heart

The hidden person of the heart is who you really are, your loves and desires; thoughts and attitudes; priorities. This is in contrast to taking care of the outside; arranging your hair, jewelry and latest fashion. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take care of our outside selves but too often that is the focus to the degree that our hearts are left uncared for.

Your heart is always more important than clothes. Next year nobody is going to remember or care about your fashion statement today but if you have neglected adorning your heart that will be very evident.

How can you adorn your heart?

1. Love God with whole heart
2. Confess sin
3. Walk in the Spirit

2. It is of imperishable beauty

The beauty of an adorned heart is imperishable, that is, it doesn’t die or decay. There is no expiration date. Adorning your heart is worth it because it is true beauty that lasts.

1. Doesn’t stain, rip, fray
2. Doesn’t wrinkle
3. It does not spoil in any way
4. Doesn’t go out of fashion

In fact it lasts and is preserved for all eternity. Your heart is who you are and one day you will come face to face with the Lord of glory and it will not matter what color your toe nails are or what hairstyle you have, if you are too thin or too fat, etc.

There is nothing wrong with taking care of our selves and looking nice but the overwhelming preoccupation for many of you is your outward appearance and not your heart.

Sarah was more beautiful than anyone living today and yet she is remembered and commended for the beauty of her heart.

3. It is very precious in the sight of God

The phrase very precious means of highest cost; the most expensive that there is possible; the very end of the most it could cost. Nothing is more costly!

Can God really ever say that about you or me? Who is God’s most valued possession? Jesus Christ. A gentle and quiet spirit is a Christ-filled, Christ-controlled, Christ-consumed, Christ-glorifying spirit. That kind of spirit is precious in God’s sight. A gentle and quiet spirit is of the most highest value to God because it is Christ in us.

Here’s the key: adorning outwardly glorifies me, but adorning inwardly glorifies God. We either seek to call attention to our own glory or we reveal the glory of God in Christ.

Specifically and practically what does it mean to have a gentle and quiet spirit?

Gentle

The word gentle also means meek, mild, or humble. The noun form of the word isn’t addressing so much the outward behavior in how you relate to others, but “rather it is an in wrought grace of the soul and the exercises of it are first and chiefly towards God. It is that temper of spirit in which we accept His dealings with us as good and therefore without disputing or resisting” (Vines dictionary).

Sarah’s faith was in God, she trusted His will for her, therefore could obey Abraham even in danger. As God took care of her she must have rejoiced and trusted Him even more.

Quiet

The second word Peter uses is quiet. This does not mean someone who doesn’t talk. When I was your age I was very shy and didn’t talk so I thought this described me but I was very wrong. Quiet comes from a compound word meaning to keep one’s seat; to be still. It describes one who is undisturbed, settled, immovable and doesn’t disturb those around them. It sounds a lot like tree planted by streams of living water in Psalm 1:2-3.

When people are around you are they drawn to Christ or agitated? Are you a giver or taker? Are you concerned about the other person or yourself?

Only one who is living for Christ wholeheartedly can have this kind of quiet spirit.

Five Traits NOT Found in a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

1. Manipulation

Girls can devise all kinds of plans to get their way and be noticed.

2. Self-pity

This is the “poor me” attitude, unforgiving of others and expecting others to meet your needs rather than others-oriented.

3. Easily Offended

Girls often get upset because somebody did not meet their expectations. Do others have to tip toe around you?

4. Arrogance

This is the “me and what I’m doing is most important” attitude. They have a big need to be recognized. “I’m too important to do that task.” We are around lots of these kinds of people and they are a drain, not gentle or humble.

5. Complaining

Often those who have been given the most are often the biggest complainers. All of you girls have an abundance and much to be thankful for. When was the last time you thanked your parents for even one thing they’ve done for you? Do you even notice what they’ve done for you? How about thanking God?

If you have any of these traits or one’s like them you are not trusting God or submitting to the people in your life that you should be. Neither do you have a gentle and quiet spirit.

All the outward beauty practices in the world won’t hide the ugliness of any of these qualities in your life.

Three Biblical Traits Connected with a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

In contrast these are a few of the qualities that are connected with a gentle and quiet spirit in Scripture.

1. The fruit of the Spirit – Gal 5:22,23

The gentle and quiet spirit is connected with the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

2. Contentment

A gentle and quiet spirit is thankful. It sees blessings and acknowledges that those blessings were given by God. The gentle and quiet spirit is also patient with God’s plan.

3. Confident

A gentle and quiet spirit knows that God’s way is always best. Those who trust Him completely are ready to obey. They also have an eternal perspective. If you are living just for the pleasure of the day you will be very frustrated and disappointed with the people and circumstances in your life.

Conclusion

I hope you are able to see the very strong, opposing contrast between a young lady whose faith is in God verses faith in herself, one who is adorning the outward and physical instead of her heart, one who can then submit and one who can’t.

You need to start seriously adorning your heart right now. You are commanded to, you will be held accountable by God, and it is urgent.

Don’t think, “When I’m get to High School then I’ll be serious, or college, or when I get married.” It does not work that way. In fact the longer you wait the harder it is. If you complain now, you will when you get married, easily offended, self pity, etc.

I urge you to adorn your heart with a gentle and quiet spirit that trusts in God.